


Not Princess

by LoveChilde



Category: Killjoys (TV)
Genre: Collection: Purimgifts Day 2, Community: purimgifts, Gen, Naming names, Pre-Series
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-06
Updated: 2017-03-06
Packaged: 2018-09-29 23:27:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10147211
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LoveChilde/pseuds/LoveChilde
Summary: It's been a few days since Johnny Jaqobis stole a ship and accidentally also stole a blood-covered, mostly insane woman. And she refuses to tell him her name, so what's a guy to do? He'll just have to pick one for her.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [darthjamtart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/darthjamtart/gifts).



“Listen, lady, I gotta have something to call you.” It was the third day after he’d stolen a ship and found unexpected, blood drenched cargo on it. The first time he’d asked her for her name, the woman had snarled at him and threatened him with a knife. The second time, she’d ignored him. Now, three days after, with his greatest achievement in getting her closer to human being getting her to change out of the damn wedding dress and eat something, John Jaqobis was too damn tired to care what her actual name was. 

She gave him a blank stare. She hadn’t spoken in three days, but not speaking meant that she also hadn’t made a fuss about Johnny stealing her ship, and he figured he’d take silver linings where he could get them. 

“Should I just pick something?”

Nothing.

“Lucy, do you have any idea what her name is?” He asked the air. She ship liked him, so far; maybe she’d-

“If she wanted you to know, John, I’m sure she’d have told you.”

Or not. “Great, Luce, thanks for the help.”

“I’m her ship by right of inheritance. It’s not my secret to tell.” How could a stupid AI sound so prim and self-righteous? Johnny threw a hand in the air.

“Fine. I’ll just pick a name out for you, how’s that? That okay by you?”

She didn’t agree, but she didn’t object, either. Good enough. 

The next morning, with open space stretching before them, he started trying out names. His first idea, ‘Bob’ or ‘Fred’, he didn’t even dare to suggest. The woman was clearly a classy lady, from the kind of place Johnny could only dream of. She deserved a classy name. (It occurred to Johnny, given her state when he’d found her, that her dream world might’ve been a nightmare than involved weddings and bloody murder, but she still deserved a classy name).

“Okay.” Johnny cracked his knuckles. The woman, in a clean ship suit, glowered at him silently. “You’re regal enough, but Queen is stupid and Queenie is disrespectful.” She shook her head hard, and he grinned, ridiculously pleased that they were finally communicating. “Alright, not Queenie. ‘Lady’ might get confusing if we run into any other ladies…”

“Not Lady.” Her voice surprised him, raspy and rusty from disuse and possibly from screaming. But it was a huge step forward. 

“Gotcha, not Lady. Um...Princess?” 

She got up and more or less ran away from the cockpit. Johnny sighed.

“Not Princess.”

***  
Johnny spent the next two days in silent research (Lucy didn’t mind reading texts out for him, which was _awesome_ ). They stopped to buy supplies at a small, out of the way town (more expensive, less chance anybody was watching), and he noticed just how easily his new not-yet-friend got comfortable with this new, unfamiliar to her environment. Without speaking, because she was still pretty much only on monosyllables, she was both regal and approachable- and deadly. He saw her reach for her knives four or five times, and only just stopping. All in all, it was the most tense he’d ever been, shopping for food he didn’t even have to steal. 

He picked up listing name options when they got back to the ship and off the ground. Both ship and woman seemed in a good enough mood for it.

“So, the ‘nope’ list is way longer than even the ‘maybe’ list, at this point. I might just have to call you Fred, after all.” 

Her glare was eloquent, and he shrugged. “Hey, I’m trying. You could just tell me your name.”

“No.”

“Okay. So. Dame is just...not you. Too old. Mistress has the same problem as Lady, plus a world of other things against it…” Johnny ran through the mental list of terms and names he’d built with Lucy’s help. It’d been a week, he really wanted to have a name to give her already. “Hells. What do _you_ want it to be?”

“Short.” She said decisively, “Efficient.”

“Short. Efficient. Still classy, though?” She nodded, if a touch slowly, and he moved on. 

“Um...look, it’s a really archaic term, Lucy found it in a very dusty directory, but how’s about Duchess?” 

She tilted her head, her eyes narrowed, hard. “Dutch-ess. How is that short? Or efficient?”

“It’s classy, to start with. Duchess.” It fit exactly with how she had been at the market, elegant but not aloof. “It wasn’t as big a deal as queen or princess, but it had power to it.”

“Too long. Dutch-essssss.” She drew it out absurdly, and he snickered. “Complicated.”

That was the longest word she’d said all week, so Johnny knew she meant it.

“Um...We could shorten it. How about just Dutch?” It felt too short, to him, but her eyes lit up. 

“Dutch.” She snapped her teeth down at the end. “Dutch. Yes. Good.”

And so, Dutch it was. 

It was months before she opened up about what had brought her to the ship in the first place, and over a year before she told Johnny her real name. But Dutch was, just as she’d said, short and efficient and suited to her new life.

Knowing her name made no difference to Johnny, in the end. She was just Dutch. 

 

[](http://s1245.photobucket.com/user/Gills8/media/margaret-of-yorks-coronet.jpg.html)

**Author's Note:**

> Happy Purim! Art is Margaret of York's ducal coronet, as seen on this site: https://thefreelancehistorywriter.com/2013/02/24/margaret-of-york-duchess-of-burgundy/


End file.
